Sunday, 6 February 2011

The Things Sleep-Deprived Parents Say

One of the unintended consequences of starting a family is the increased likelihood of speaking jibberish.

Some recent examples from our household:

Why do you have a Klinger up your jumper? (Wife Features meant to say Clanger as in the pink creature created by Oliver Postgate. Klinger is the guy in M*A*S*H who dresses as a woman in a bid to be sent home. Now there‘s a cuddly toy likely to spark an ‘outrage’ headline in the Highland News.)

Please remove that spatula from my trousers.

We could put Velcro on her bottom…”

"Ahh. Cuffs on pyjamas are great. It means you dont get draughts. Wife Features purred this to me one night. Grr! Easy, tiger

"Get in the bath. Youre covered in jelly.

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